Living gluten free often results in misunderstandings and confusion. Sometimes it may lead to family conflict just as it did in the situation that led to this e-mail I recently received:

“The family members or friends who REFUSE to comply due to whatever reason (ignorance, stupidity, apathy, unloving), should be given all necessary information about Celiac Disease in writing along with a brief explanation of how sick you get if you eat gluten products. If they seem to understand, good. But if they don’t, then meet with them one-on-one to more fully describe how VERY sick you get and exactly what happens to you, plus add the possible effects of malnutrition, cancer….whatever gets their attention. If they still won’t comply, tell them you are very sorry that you cannot attend future dinners, parties, events, holidays at their home due to their non-compliance. Then just don’t go there to eat. It should only take one time before they get it. O the other hand, you could just eat first and not eat any of the food and do not enter the kitchen. My mother-in-law refuses to comply so we do not eat at her house ever and when she comes into our house with food, we just hand it back to her and ask her to leave. If she leaves food in the house that she has brought for us to eat, we throw it down the garbage disposal. Some people are only able to think of themselves no matter what you tell them.”

My personal reaction to this is the writer is responsible for his or her diet (unless there are some very special circumstances that are not mentioned in this letter). The people involved in this conflict have a double-edged problem — curing the physical wounds caused by celiac disease and the emotional wounds caused this family dispute. I pray for them in both situations. I was rather lucky: the two principle cooks our family (my wife and daughter-in-law) watched me fall apart from celiac disease and will never allow me to cheat. My symptoms are serious enough that I will never cheat intentionally. In some respects, having serious celiac symptoms is a blessing.

I’d love to publish your ideas about this subject and/or accounts where the gluten free diet has resulted in serious conflicts. E-mail me at gfceliac@gmail.com or leave a comment at the end of this article.